SORRY...KEV'S FIRST DRAFT.
AUSTRALIAN APOLOGY TO THE ABORIGINAL POPULATION
We apologise for giving you doctors and free medical care, which allows you to survive and multiply so that you can demand apologies.
We apologise for helping you to read and teaching you the English language and thus we opened up to you the entire European civilisation, thought and enterprise.
We feel that we must apologise for building hundreds of homes for you, which you have vandalised and destroyed.
We apologise for giving you law and order which has helped prevent you from slaughtering one another and using the unfortunate for food purposes.
We apologise for developing large farms and properties, which today feed you people, where before, you had the benefits of living off the land and starving during droughts.
We apologise for providing you with warm clothing made of fabric to replace the animal skins you used before.
We apologise for building roads and railway tracks between cities, and building cars so that you no longer have to walk over harsh terrain.
We apologise for paying off your vehicle when you fail to pay the installments
We apologise for giving you free travel anywhere, whenever.
We apologise for giving each and every member of your family $100.00 and free travel to anywhere to attend an aboriginal funeral.
We apologise for not charging you rent on any lands when white people have to pay.
We apologise for giving you interest free loans.
We apologise for developing oil wells and minerals, including gold and diamonds and other precious minerals, which you never used and had no idea of their value.
We apologise for developing Ayers rock and Kakadu, and handing them over to you so that you get all the money.
We apologise for allowing taxpayers money paid towards daughters' weddings ($8,000.00 each daughter)
We apologise for giving you "incremental funds" of $1.7 billion per year for your 250,000 people, which is $68,000.00 per aboriginal man, woman and child.
We apologise for working hard to pay taxes that then finance your welfare, medical care, education, etc to the tune of $1.2 billion each year, which is $48,000.00 per aboriginal man, woman and child
We apologise for you having to approach the aboriginal affairs department to verify the above figures.
We apologise for the trouble you will have identifying the "uncle toms" in your own community who are getting richer and leaving some of you living in squalor and poverty.
We do apologise. We really do.
We humbly beg your forgiveness for all the above sins.
We are only too happy to take back all the above and return you to the paradise of the "outback", whenever you are ready.